Tuesday,
July 31. Newport Beach, CA.
Stayed up
late last night – 10:30 – watching the Olympics on the couch at Glenys’ house
and I ended up pretty much falling asleep in the seated position with old guy
drool beginning to dribble down the side of my mouth. Time for beddy bye! And
what a wonderful feeling it was to sleep until 7:30 AM. THAT was just like
nirvana. And not having to get on the bike to ride for the first time in 60
days. THAT feels good.
Now
I realize that I’ve been able to do some things that you just cannot take for
granted, such as for example these cross-country bike trips. So to hear me say
that I’m happy to not be getting up early to ride my bike, that probably sounds
heretical. But honestly, sometimes when you get used to something for a long
period of time, no matter how precious that particular activity or lifestyle
might be, you tend to get a bit complacent, or stale, or even a bit tired of
the routine, of the hum-drum. That’s me right now. The end of this trip as
opposed to the ends of the previous three, this one was the most anticipated
and the most appreciated. Really, and I’m not exaggerating here, it’s a sense
of relief to finish this one. It was just that hard mentally and physically.
I’m ready to get back to the routine I’d left 60 days ago.
So
here I am sitting in this beautiful, cozy little house on the bay of Newport
Beach trying to put into words what all this is, what it was, and what it means
to me. First let’s go through the stats on this trip: 3710 miles from DC to
Oceanside, CA in 59 straight days. No off days on this trip. The daily average
= 62 miles – very low compared to my previous trips and yet I had support this
year. I’ve easily spent triple the
amount of money for this trip as I had in the previous three. And yet I’m still
light years from actually accomplishing my vision of American Dirt having done about 1700 miles of dirt out of
those 3700 miles of riding. The physical difficulty of this year’s journey was
exponentially tougher than the previous three. Ditto for the mental difficulty.
The preparation for this one, the equipment, the logistics, the terrain –
ditto, ditto, ditto, and more ditto. But hey, that’s what I had wanted to do,
to do something way more challenging that what I’d done on the previous trips.
On that side, this was a total success.
But
let’s get to the crux of the matter – riding across the country totally on soft
surfaces – American Dirt. You could boil it down to the simplest of questions:
success or failure now that I’m finished? Had you asked me how I would answer
that question several months prior to doing this trip, back in the formative
days, I’d have answered that it would be failure to not accomplish the goal, or
at least come very close to accomplishing the goal. Today, having been through
what I’ve just been through, I’d have to say that it was a success in that I’ve
gotten just a bit closer to accomplishing this grandiose goal. I suppose that
having put so much sweat, blood, time and money into this, and then calling it
a complete and utter failure would take away from the numerous positive gains
that I’d made. Now I am still kind of second guessing myself on a number of
different fronts here, you know, the woulda, coulda, shoulda stuff. And I think
that’s only natural. But honestly, I think you’ve got come away from an attempt
like this with an air of optimism, with a sense of what you’ve learned and what
you need to do differently to get closer to the prize. And by God I’ve really
learned a ton on this attempt.
In
my first blog back on 5/21 I stated that I did not think that I’d be able to do
the complete American Dirt in its purest sense, and that I’d have to create
some parameters to live by where I could kind of “cheat” my way through certain
situations and terrains. These I’d erroneously figured might make it possible
to reach the west coast with a “pseudo-AD route established. And those
guidelines I lived by for 17 days of riding, where I managed to get from DC to
Hocking Hills SP in Ohio nearly the whole way on soft surfaces – save for at
the VERY most a couple miles of
pavement on super dangerous descents where I had only two choices: walk or ride pavement. I rode and
bike-a-hiked on trail, ATV track, dirt roads, foot trails, RR tracks, and on
gravel and earthen berms alongside asphalt roads. But during my ride on 6/18 I
came to the realization that even with the “cheat” parameters as options we
were just so far away from making it across the country at that pace with those
parameters. Back then I was averaging a mere 25-30 miles/day and putting in 5-7
hr days that were just kicking my ass. Forget about doing 100/day – that belief
was a pipedream once I got down to the real deal!
What followed next on 6/18 was “The Decision,” blog, my
sarcastic parody of Lebron Jame’s asinine TV program about his choosing an NBA
team. I had come to the decision
that I’d rather get all the way across the country with even more “cheat”
sections than I would by spending a fortune in time, money and effort and only
getting as far as the Mississippi River by staying true to the cause. And
staying true to the cause meant long sections of berm riding through Southern
Ohio, Southern Indiana and Southern Illinois. That berm riding was the hardest,
most intimidating, brutal - and
dangerous – riding that I’d ever done on a bike. That was my undoing so to
speak. As I think back, the fact that this revelation occurred in Southern Ohio
makes total sense to me. I mean down there riding up the relentless and steep
asphalt hills is hard enough, but when you try to do it on the gravel and
earthen berms of those asphalt roads it’s just so difficult that I cannon truly
describe it with any sort of justice. You have to experience it day after day
to feel the total and complete beat down of going only 25 miles in a whole day
of riding.
Now I’d anticipated and embraced this facet of riding when
training for the trip over the past year, but NEVER upon anything on par with
the severity and frequency of the terrain I encountered in Southern Ohio. I had
struggled up and down so many of those climbs on berms that I think it just
broke me mentally. Seeing one berm climb after another, and one berm descent
after another and knowing that I’d either be pushing the bike, or climbing and
descending in weeds, rubble, gravel, or in ditches, that really helped me see
the light as to just how complex this American Dirt thing really was. And not
only was it just the physically taxing nature of the trip, but it was also the
whole concept of the time and money needed to do it properly. That just
completely showed me the reality of such an endeavor. The light bulb went on in
my head.
So yes, American Dirt could be certainly be done by bridging
all the soft surface tracks I’d researched by riding on berms, but the cost of
said berm riding – SHEEEEEEEE IT was that a high cost indeed! Thus, I decided
to concede to riding asphalt instead of the berm as the bridges to my soft
surface tracks, thereby continuing on the trek westward with a savings of time,
money and effort. So that was really my first concession of the trip, and as
much as I broke my initial rules, I was ok with the decision.
Enter next the heat wave, actually heat wave #1 of the trip.
And damn there were many on this trip. Heat wave #1 began in Southern Ohio,
where temps had risen to the 90’s, and it just continued with me all through
IN, IL, MO, and KS. Riding on the regular road is one thing in heat and
humidity, but go on gravel, dirt, trail, ATV track, and suddenly the efforts
are more strenuous, more time consuming, and much slower. That heat just made
each and every twist and turn in the road that much tougher to get through. And
this is where, for the fist time in 4 straight years of crossing the country
that I actually had thoughts of quitting cross my mind. Now I know that part of
it was from having done it three times previous. Somehow, the act of
replicating a challenge is harder because you’ve already accomplished it. I
remember the time I crossed Canada, and it was my first trans-continental
crossing, and I’ll tell you what: there was NEVER a second where I considered
quitting. I was as driven as I’d ever been in attaining my goal. Such was also
the case for my second trip across the US where I went solo. And honestly, it
was the same for my third solo across the US.
But as I look back on this trip, could be that my having
conceded to letting go of those initial goals, that may have been a catalyst to
the negative vibes I was getting once the going got tough with the heat. I mean
what the hell, I’d given up on crossing the country as I’d envisioned it for
American Dirt, what was the use of going on in that way with that heat on
asphalt roads? And there were
several times where I would talk to Judy in the evening and relay to her my
feelings about quitting. She was always willing to stand by me no matter what
the decision. So I’d sleep on it, get up in the morning, put on the game-face
and do it all over again. I think it all came down to the fact that despite me
loosing hold of my initial goal, I still had some kind of goal to reach for,
and that was finishing the job – riding across the country. It was still a
challenge. And beside…I just hate quitting!!
So we made it to MO, with me having ridden a combination of
asphalt and soft surfaces through some extremely challenging terrain in
Southern OH, IN, and IL. The heat only continued as we rode the gravel Katy
Trail 265 miles through MO. But once in KS, the heat long heat wave died down
enough for me to really regroup, refocus and get down to business and go for
the gusto with dirt and gravel riding damned near through the whole state of
KS. I’d felt re-energized, reinvigorated, reborn with my American Dirt concept.
And I have to say that this was some of the most enjoyable as well as
challenging riding I’d done in all my life. Those 4-500 miles of dirt, gravel,
sand, that was what I’d dreamed about for American Dirt. But again, more
setbacks came along, this time in the way of thorns that punctured and ruined
every tire, tube and patch kit I’d had on board for the trip. From far Western
KS into Eastern CO, I was flatting 1, 2, 3 times per day from the notorious
“sandbur”.
Suddenly I just felt totally deflated again, having made
such good time and distance with the gravel and earthen riding, and feeling
like I had a real shot at redemption, but then being suddenly shot in the ass
by stuff I’d never even anticipated. That was frustrating, I think mainly
because it was a very big detail
that I’d not even considered when planning this trip. It was from out of
left field and it was formidable. My dirt riding ground down to a halt until I
could get the proper equipment to deal with it. That had meant that I was going
to have to ride half way across CO before I could get to a bike shop that would
have the right gear. I mean hell, on the KS/CO border there was nothing in the
way of bike shops. Had to drive to Pueblo, CO for the gear.
Once I did get that situation taken care of with thorn
resistant tubes, tires and liners, the tubes began failing on me. Why I’m still
not sure. Was it operator error in the installation of all these pieces, or
just plain ole equipment failure of the tubes? I mean there were several
situations where I was just so pissed off that I wanted to cash it in and end
the madness right then and there. That was a time of some real soul searching,
because I was really still a long, long way off from reaching the coast. You
get to the Eastern border of CO and look at a map – that just BARELY a smidge
over half way across the country!
At that point I’d really reckoned with the next direction
we’d go, what with all the sandbur trouble and the route logistics. Prior to
reaching Limon, CO the logistics were pretty simple with respect to keeping the
trip on dirt – use tracks that parallel the interstates such that we had easy
access to support and communication. But west of Limon, support logistics
became exponentially more difficult. No longer did the dirt tracks parallel the
interstates. Many of the tracks drifted for tens if not more miles off of
parallel. And ten to twenty miles away from the interstate you loose
cell-service. What’s more these were roads that turned out to be totally out of
the question for Judy to drive an 8-passenger van on for support. From my
experiences on the dirt roads of MO and KS, these were tracks that were usable
only to motocross motorcycles, ATV’s and 4-wheel drive vehicles. Yup, that’s
what I learned in MO & KS about dirt roads on maps: it may be listed as a
road, it may look like a road, it may have a name like a road, but in reality
it may be nothing more than an access path or a rutted out ribbon of dbl track.
Good thing about MO & KS was the fact that the van would be a mere 1-5 miles
away along the paralleling interstate, so I was always within support distance.
Not so from Central CO westward.
So despite having new skins for the mt bike, and an ability
to take on the thorns of the west, I had to figure out whether it was prudent
or not to do the second half of the trip on truly remote stretches of dirt
through mts, plains and/or deserts. Either way I decided to go, whether it
would be north across WY, UT and ID, or south across NM, AZ and CA, I’d still
have two things to deal with the remoteness of the dirt tracks. Couldn’t get
around that fact that I’d either be truly unsupported in many sections or that
I’d have to take a chance and have Jude drive the van on dirt tracks that could
be real trouble. Just couldn’t get around that one.
In the end my decision was to go the southern route through
NM, AZ and CA into new territory for me with respect to riding X-country, and
to do most all of the riding on asphalt, with the support dilemma being a real
consideration. But honestly though, let the truth be told, by that point I was
fried, burned out, tired and wanted to finish the friggen trip. So even when we
were next to frontage roads that were gravel, dirt and sand, I opted for the
asphalt only because I could go faster, ride easier, and finish quicker. Could
I have tacked on another 3-500 miles of soft surfaces to the trip’s total?
Unequivocally yes!
But mind you now, even doing the asphalt through NM, AZ and
CA, that was just a total bitch what with the desert heat. Never had I
experienced such severity of heat on an hourly basis. It was a major deal to
get up every morning at 3:30 AM to be on the road at 5:30 AM in an attempt to
try to get a jump on the heat. You’d get in maybe like 2.5 hrs where you’re
pretty good, and then by 10 AM it became otherworldly. It was like riding in a
blast furnace. Again, cashing it in would have been so easy to do each and
every day. And I knew from past experience that if I could just went one more
day, and then one more day, again and again and again, that once finished I’d
be proud of the fact that I didn’t give up, no mater how far off of my goal I
was. And that’s why I finished – I just did not want to give in to that
negative voice in my head.
Up until now I haven’t really touched on the most important
component of this trip - Judy. Really, without her help, encouragement and
support there is no way in the world I could have done what I did this year.
Her job in many ways was so much harder than what I did. And her mental
strength to do so day after day was amazing. I mean the last 60 days she’s run
that van all over hell’s half acre, getting food made for me, buying supplies,
setting up hotels and motels, getting information, listening to my rants and
raves and my periodic episodes of insanity. She boiled her buns off in the heat
waiting patiently for me in remote areas, all alone, and always (almost) with a
smile. The list goes on and on. There is just no way in the world that I could
have done this particular route solo – impossible. She was my sounding board in
the evening after so many days when I wanted to just say the hell with it. She
endured many, many mornings of me getting up at 3 & 4 AM to get ready for
the day on the road, and endured my having to work for 3-4 hrs every afternoon
as soon as I got off the bike. She put up with this nonsense for two months and
is still here by my side. And for that I’m deeply happy.
So there it is…Take it for whatever you think. Now comes the
big question: Do I believe that American Dirt is possible? Absolutely, yes I
do. But with this addendum: I can and will not attempt to do this again as we
did it this year. It’s for too big for two people – a rider and a support
person in a non-off road vehicle. To really accomplish American Dirt takes more
money and time than I alone have to put in. It’s really a major endeavor that
will take at least triple the finances that I’d put into this year. Not only
that, but it will take at least 3-4 other support members and at least 1 more
vehicle – a pilot vehicle that is a 4-wheel drive and able to go on every road
the rider/riders go on. It will take someone other than just the rider/riders
to negotiate the ever-changing route in real time, not just the night before as
I had done on this trip. It will take a minimum of 3 months, and quite possibly
4-6 months to do it right, berms and all.
But as I stated in my first blog back in May, I’m
taking a break on this cross-country stuff, even if I came upon a sponsor who
would be willing to give this American Dirt thing a go. I just need a break for
a bit. I need to recharge with some other trips and other adventures, and then
maybe, just maybe come back to American Dirt with a new attitude and a new
sense of adventure. I also owe my girlfriend a very big trip of HER choosing
for what she’s just endured for me. And with this I’m going to close it out and
say thanks so much to all of you for your continued encouragement through this
trip. I have to say that there were days when that one email helped to pick up
my spirits and keep me moving west. Love you guys and I look forward to seeing
each and every one of you when we get home. All the best everyone……….pete and
judy.